What a process

To say that emotionally I did well yesterday is true... passing out.. wellllllll...... I almost did. :)
I got up bright and early at 7:08 (thanks Country Biscuit!) I had my alarm set for 730 so I could take my medicine before I went in. We had to be there right at 9. No later. We ended up getting there a bit before because you know me and time... I hate being late! I had my ipod with some tunes and some celebrity magazine. I had to keep my mind off this whole thing and it really helped. I was split from Daniel and taken back to change and to get my iv started. Thats when things went not so well. I HATE... I mean LOATH needles, iv's, etc. I get light headed and it just quite frankly wigs me out! I got stuck in my left arm which is the arm I never get stuck in so it was different trying to wrap my brain around that. It went in very easy but my brain had a hard time processing it. So I almost fainted. The nurse had the smelling salts there just in case. She knows me so well. I got a wrist band and chatted back and forth with the nurse so I could distract myself. Over time, the anastisiologist came in to talk with me. He asked me if I knew what I was there for... DUHHHHH. Anyways, I told him I couldnt look at him because he was on my left side and that would mean I would see the iv in my arm. He joked saying that girls dont look at him all that often so it didn't bother him. It made me laugh. After he left, the doc came in and talked with me. Asked me if I had questions, signed docs, etc. Same thing with him. I couldnt look at him due to the iv. Then after he left one of the nurses got me and took me to where everything was going to happen. On the floor after the door opened was some big silver sticky tape. It was about 3ft by 4ft and there were two patches of them. They have them there to collect germs. I stepped over them and then went into the room. It was a small room. It could not be any bigger than a 9x9. The anesthesiologist put 5 ekg things on me to monitor me and then hooked me up to some medicine for pain. The nurse had me in this contraption... (Im thinking tmi here so I wont go any further) Then the anesthesiologist asked what I liked to drink. I asked him if he was talking about alcohol or not. He said alcohol. I said wine and he said well consider this a double dose and tell me when you start to feel it. I did and then I was out. The next thing I know, Im back where I started in the room with my clothes hanging there. I came to it pretty quickly and after dressing the doc came in to tell me they got 4. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. All these shots, all these drugs, poking, needles, etc and only 4. WOW.... way to be an overachiever! (Thats what I was telling my bum ovaries) 4 is better than 3. He explained why they couldnt get any more and it made sense. Val came in with some food and the nurse went over what to do for the rest of the day and the next few days. Then I was out of there. Diane came with Val to pick me up since Daniel had to go to work. One of the managers took off this week of work so they are down to next to nothing. Anyways, knowing that about 1 out of every 3 actually makes it, I was thinking only 1 would make it. I already was mentally preparing my brain that none would make it just because of the consistent disappointment time and time again. After going home and getting a bit to eat, we all went out for mexican and then I took a 3 hour nap. Got up and then went back to bed. I was just so tired. My body had had it. I was emotionally and physically exhausted. Im still tired today but am trucking through it.
Today I got a call from the embryologist. He said 2 made it into 2 cells. The other rejected ICSI. (aka cells not dividing, no life possible) I am happy that there are two but NOW everyone keeps asking... well are you going to put both in or one. This is a very personal decision for both Daniel and myself. I have been thinking one way and he another. But the big thing is that we dont and wont know what grade the little jellybeans have become until we go there Thursday am. That could play a big role in our decision. I will say that one person is making a good case. We will come to terms on this decision soon I'm sure.
Alex asked me if I was going to name them. I'm not sure. Yes I would like to but then that means I am getting very attached and what if it doesn't work? Heartbreak for sure. Maybe once we know in February, I might, but not now. I think the worst part from here on out is that instead of just waiting 13 days, we have to wait 15 days for blood work. (since day 13 is a weekend. Bummer)